


Thunder

by R_L_Williams



Series: Pas De Deux (Dance of two) [12]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Aftercare, Anal Sex, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Fluff and Smut, Foreplay, M/M, Making Love, Power Exchange
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-07
Updated: 2017-06-07
Packaged: 2018-11-10 09:55:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,792
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11124780
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/R_L_Williams/pseuds/R_L_Williams
Summary: the second destiel sex scene from this massive ficdean wants to bottom but is scared because of reasons stated in earlier chapters cas helps make it lovely <3title from Jessie J song





	Thunder

“Hey Cas” Dean said timidly looking at his lap  
“Yes”  
“Can I be on bottom this time?”  
“If you want to, of course you can”  
“Is it…okay if we go really slow?”  
“I wouldn’t have it any other way” Cas pressed a kiss to Dean fore head before walking to his closet and pulling out a long wooden box along with the usual assortment of items he gathered before sex; bar towels, lube, condoms- he walked over to the night stand and set down the loose items and then the box  
“what’s in the box…Brad Pitt…seven…no…okay” Dean said with a smirk, Cas squinted slightly bewildered, Cas flipped the lid of the box to reveal a collection of rainbow plugs in ever increasing sizes. The purple was the smallest and the red was the largest.  
“don’t worry we aren’t starting with these but…well get to them.”  
“I didn’t realize you were such a connoisseur of plugs.”  
“I'm not I just saw this set and really liked the idea. Plus the proceeds went to a local home for MOGAI youth. Cas stood their face screwed up in thought for a moment. "hmm..." he walked over to his dresser and grabbed his back pack, bringing it over to the night stand and slipping all of the aforementioned items into the bag. wait 10 minutes and meet me in...infirmary for lack of a better word."  
"why wont Ellen be there"  
"no she works their but her room is down the hall like all the other staff"  
"isn't it locked"  
"yes"  
"then how will we get in?"  
Cas pulled his keys out of his bag and held up a small silver colored one.  
"Ellen gave this to me after my second year when i injured my Achilles. so give me 10 minutes and meet me in her office...alright?"  
"yeah sure." Cas smiled and then quietly slipped out of the room  
\----  
after roughly 10 minutes had passed dean strolled down the hallway as casually as he could and walked up to the door of Ellens' office and knocked very softly. after a couple of seconds Cas answered. dean slipped inside and Cas locked the door behind him  
"this way" Cas lead dean back to the back room where the tub was. dean could smell the lavender from here. they walked into a room lit with mostly candles with a steaming tub in the center. "get in." Cas directed, dean shrugged, stripped down and slid into the tub resting his head on the back of the tub "so this is how this is going to work. I'm going to hand you the plugs and you are going to put them in and take them out your self at your speed. and when you get to the last one you can get out dry off and head back to the room and ill meet you there after i clean up okay?"  
"umm...sure...sounds good."  
"great" Cas took out his iPod and small speaker and put on some Linda Ronstadt torchlighty' album. he then pulled up a chair sat the box in his lap, flipped it open and pulled out the purple plug. "here ya go, so...the only tip i can really give you is don't forget to breath...alright."  
"alright." dean took the fist plug out of his lovers hand. Cas reached down picked up the bottle of lube and squeezed a drop or to onto the ceramic plug  
"spread that around."  
"okay."  
"now just hike your knees up and slide it in whenever you feel ready. and if that seems a tad intimidating start with a finger first  
"i think ill be fine but ill keep that in mind." dean exhaled deeply, sliding his legs most of the way up to his chest closing his eyes as he slowly slid in the first tentative inches  
“so hows it feel?”  
“Kinda odd but I'm getting used to it…I'm sure there’s a…learning curve for lack of a better word”  
“yes there definitely is, lots of lube and deep breathing helps a lot but like most things you still have to work up to it.”  
“I'm sure I’ll learn to love it in no time with a partner like you” Dean said with a wink “How will I know when I've…gotten comfortable with it?”  
“The plug or anal sex in general?”  
“The plug.”  
“Oh, umm you’ll feel your body relax and…do you feel that slight…achy burn?”  
“Yeah.”  
“That will dissipate.”  
“I'm glad to hear that” Dean replied with a chuckle  
“So will we have to go through this whole process every time I want to be on bottom?”  
“Probably not, the body adapts rather quickly, particularly if you’re knowledgeable and gentle about whatever it is you’re trying to get it to adapt to. We may have to go through this whole process a few times but you will start to relax into it quicker and after a while we will probably be able to skip the smaller plugs. For example typically when I'm on bottom I only use the one plug as a warm up and that’s just because I'm not terribly fond of the burn; though if you go a prolonged period of time without bottoming it will probably behoove us to repeat this process.”  
“Ah okay…makes sense…speaking of plugs…the burns gone.”  
“Good, well just leave it for a little longer, we got nothing but time, there’s no sense in rushing.”  
“How long did it take you to get used to it?”  
“Well, I've been experimenting…mostly with myself…since I was a young teen. So I was pretty used to it by the time I actually found a partner.”  
“Ah, so when did you know?”  
“That I found males attractive?”  
“Yeah”  
“umm, I'm not sure I always found men to be attractive but…this first time I saw Vigo Mortensen dressed as Aragorn …splattered with blood, his hair all amess...that cocky smile when he says ‘let’s hunt some orc’….mmmm…so you ready for the next plug?”  
“yeah sure and…hold up…you mean to tell me you’ve not only seen lord of the rings but…you can quote it and Vigo was your first official man crush ?”  
“Yes, can you blame me?” Cas said with a smirk as dean gently pulled the plug out  
“Nah, he was my favorite too…” dean said as he rinsed off the plug and sat it on the small end table next to the tub  
“Okay, one down, ready for the next one?”  
“Yeah.” Dean said with a nod. Cas slicked up the indigo plug handed it to dean  
“Take a breath.” Dean followed the instruction “now as you press in, slowly…and I do mean slowly let it out.” Dean did thusly but ran out of air before he ran out of plug. Dean had a slight look of discomfort on his face  
“You alright honey?”  
“Yeah just…” he took in another breath and exhaled slowly “trying to relax”  
“Well you’re doing really well .”Dean let out a small gasp as his body accepted the last inch of the plug "not gonna lie...that's my favorite part"  
"the wide part"  
"not exactly...i just love that spike of sensation as you get tooo the widest point"  
"I'm guessing its an aquired taste...Why is there even an idigo plug?”  
“Because indigo is technically a step in the color spectrum even though most of the time, particularly with rainbows you can’t see indigo as a distinct color…it kind of melds into blue and violet.”  
“I love it when you get all geeky.”  
“Nerdy sweetie, nerds are academically inclined and geeks are passionate about their hobbies.” Cas extrapolated cuddling up next to Dean  
“hu, I always thought the words were interchangeable.”  
“Nope, totally different meanings.” Cas pressed gentle kisses all along his jaw and neck,  
“Well…you read Stephen Hawking…and you quote lord of the rings…so what does that make you?”  
“Colloquially…a dork” Cas answered as he gently ran his fingers through Deans hair  
“Being a geek and a nerd makes you a whales penis…?”  
“Apparently, all the other slang terms must have already been used up.” They both shared a giggle. “I love the way your face lights up when you smile.” Cas said stroking Deans cheek, Dean jerked away.  
“Sorry, I appreciate the compliment…but don’t…don’t stroke my face please…”  
“Why for?” Cas questioned, Dean got quiet “oh…oh honey I'm sorry.”  
“Its fine, this is minor, I would just hate for us to take any steps backwards ya know?”  
“Yes I do, and thank you for telling me.” Cas leaned in and pressed a kiss to deans cheek  
“you ready to move on to the next one?”  
“Might as well.”  
“You don’t sound too enthused. you can wait a little more if you want.”  
“Nah I'm fine"  
“alright.” Cas shrugged and lubed up the next plug as dean slipped the indigo one out. dean continued with the ever more familiar process “is it getting a little more comfortable now.”  
“Yeah, the end is always the hardest part. That’s still hard to adjust to but the rest of it is getting easier…just gotta…”dean let out a hiss as he eased in the widest part of the plug “breathe” Dean said, more to himself than to Cas he inhaled. As the plug locked itself in place  
“So who was your first man crush?” Cas asked  
“Honestly, Brad Pitt…particularly in fight club…and even more so in SNATCH when hes got tattoos.”  
“Have a thing for the bad boys do you?”  
“Only…a lot” dean replied with a chuckle, resting his head back on the tub and stretching out his legs  
“Then how did you end up with me?”  
“I dunno…musta been the eyes.” Dean replied running his fingers lightly through Cass' hair  
“You like my eyes?”  
“Yeah, how could I not…they remind me of Vincent Van Gogh.” Cas had a perplexed look on his face.  
“That’s a bit of an odd connection to make.” Cas said as dean began slowly slipping the plug out with practiced ease  
“Not when you consider his most famous painting.”  
“What to you see as his most famous painting?” Cas asked  
“Starry night.” Dean said looking up at Cas, Cas paused looking at Dean; mouth slightly agape “Yup, nothing but stars.” Dean said warmly, smiling up at Cas. Cas smiled back and bent down, gently kissing his beaming lover. Cas rubbed his nose sweetly against Deans before pulling away. “Hey do you think we could skip the green one?”  
“Sure…but why?”  
“Eh I want to see if I can handle it.”  
“Alright.” Cas shrugged and began slicking up the yellow plug, applying a little extra lube to the plug. dean inserted the plug with particular caution. Cas could hear Dean taking deep calculated breaths, could practically feel Dean trying to relax. Cas gently stroked his back. Dean let out a rather erotic gasp when the plug locked itself in place  
“How are you doing.”  
“Good…that wasn’t as big of a stretch…hehe…as I thought it would be.”  
“Good, you should leave this one in for a while"  
they sat in silence for a moment listening to the airy yet sultry sounds of Nora Jones drifting from the small speaker  
“Shall we move onto the next one” Cas said with a proud smirk draped across his face.  
"sure, lets do it". Deans face twisted into a grimace as he began pulling out the plug. He let out his air with a hiss as the largest part of the plug was rent from his body. When the plug was completely removed Dean let out a huge gulp of air he didn’t even know he had been holding in.  
“yeah…I can skip plugs but…let’s not skip any more just yet.”  
“I figured you would say something like that. If it helps there are only 2 more plugs left, and then if you’re up for it…” Cass' eyes darted down suggestively towards his crotch and then back up at Dean. Cas repeated the lubrication and insertion process with the bright orange plug.  
“So what shall we do?”  
“could…you…work on my back?”  
“Give you a massage? Yeah I can do that, just sit up and move back a bit.” Dean sat up and let out a strange mix between a giggle and a whimper  
“Are you okay?”  
“Yeah it’s just…odd moving with it”  
“Because you can feel it moving”  
“Not so much that I feel it moving but that I feel my body moving around it”  
“Yeah that is kind of an odd sensation”  
“Dose that ever go away?”  
“mmmm…no not really but once you get use to it…once it become less alien it starts to feel rather nice actually” Cas slipped in behind dean and began working the heels of his hands into the muscles of deans shoulders. Cas worked all along the scapula until he ran into water. He worked diligently on Deans muscular back; intermittently pressing kisses along his neck. The pressure of Cass' hands on his flesh seemed to press Dean back in time…he was pressed up against a cold stone wall. Air fighting to get to his lungs, hungry hands roaming place they never should…Dean shook his head to clear the heavy fog of memory that was clouding his mind. Dean shoved the heels of his hands into his eyes.  
“You alright”  
“Yeah I just…I need a minute…do you mind if I put on a song?”  
“No not at all, do what you have to do honey.” Dean climbed out of the tub and grabbed the ipod out of his pants, he plugged it into the little speaker and picked out a song. A light but up beat Spanish guitar began filling the room; the unmistakable vocals of Elton John followed.  
“Without question?” Cas asked  
“Yeah, I call it my happy song.” Dean said with a sluggish weight to his voice as he sat down on the other edge of the tub Cas opened his mouth to say something but thought it best to leave Dean to his devices. Cas took the time to thoroughly clean the used plugs and replace them in the box. The song ended and they sat in heavy but strangely comfortable silence. Cas quietly busied himself with gazing around the room as Dean starred distantly off towards the door like he was staring into the ‘Untempered schism’ his mouth hung slightly agape, his breathing was shallow. He sat utterly oblivious to the world around him for at least 5 minutes before he crawled back onto the other side of the tub without a word. “Shall we continue?” cas asked softly  
“Yes please.” Dean answered the life returning to his voice. dean pulled out the plug with particular gentility.  
“Last one Hon.”  
“Sweet let’s do it.” dean said with mildly feigned excitement.  
“If you want to stop here we can.”  
“Nah, I'm good…I just…it gonna…take me a minute to…to…come back…”  
“Well I’ll be here when you do.”  
“I know.” Dean said, a smile in his voice but not yet on his face  
“Shall I?”  
“Yeah, go ahead.” Cas applied copious amounts of lube to the final plug and handed it to dean Once he had gently pressed in the last inch of the ruby red plug he stretched out his legs and looked at Cas  
“So, how shall we do to pass the time” Cas said. Dean slammed his eyes tightly shut.  
“Kiss me.”  
“What?”  
“Right now just kiss me. Hard.”  
“Why?”  
“Just do it please.” Dean said never opening his eyes. Cas obliged his partner who had strain smeared across his face. Cas gently tangled his fingers into deans hair, his nails softly grazing the tense skin on deans scalp. Cas tongue wound its way around Deans for a few wild moments before he pulled out of the kiss. Dean laid his forehead against Cas.  
“Please don’t ever use that exact phrase again.”  
“The one about passing time.”  
“Yes.”  
“Why for, if you don’t mind me asking?”  
“He said that exact thing…it kinda makes my skin crawl.”  
“I'm so sorry honey, Not that I'm complaining but why the kiss.”  
“it was grounding…kept me from…slipping…”Dean spaced off for a few seconds before shaking his head and looking up at Cas with a forced but still genuine smile. “plus you’re a good kisser.”  
“So what shall we do?”  
"you could climb in here with me" dean said suggestively  
"i would but i don't feel like getting in just to get back out if its all the same to you  
"fair enough"  
a few moments passed of the two men just sitting stroking whatever body parts they could reach,  
“so Ready to head back to the room  
“Yeah I think so”  
Cas helped dean out of the tub and toweled him off, pressing ever so gently on the ruby red plug nestled between his partners muscular cheeks. "okay get dressed and head back to the room, and get comfy ill be there in a minute, alright"  
"alright." dean pressed a kiss to Cass' cheek before walking out of the room and out of the office.  
\---  
Cas returned to the room in about 10 minutes  
"how do you feel?"  
"good" dean replied stretching out on the bed lacing his hands behind his head."  
“how are you.” Dean asked motioning slightly to Cass' penis as Cas began to undress Being this intimate with Dean was enough to get him half way hard.  
“half way there.” Cas replied with a shrug as he pulled off the last of his clothes. He climbed onto the bed and worked himself over for a moment until he was fully erect before reaching over to the night stand and taking hold of a condom. Cas tore the wrapper open and slipped it on his hardened member. He slicked his length with extra lube…you can never have too much lube in situations like these. He then used his finger and re lubed Dean just for good measure. He scooted up in between Dean, his strong legs lying on either side of Cass' hips. Cas gripped on to Deans hips and then looked down at his trembling partner.  
“you ready”  
“As I’ll ever be”  
“Dean”  
“Yes”  
“I understand you’re scared…just know I will never do anything to make you uncomfortable or hurt you…the only thing I want from this is to make you happy. If we need to stop at any point…I don’t give a shit if I am a single thrust away from coming you say the word and I will make you tea and put on a movie…okay?”  
“Okay” Dean said with a giggle”  
“Thank you for trusting me”  
“Thank you for being patient”  
Cas smiled warmly remembering the first time he and Dean exchanged those same sentiments. Cas lined up with Deans entrance and began to press himself inside Dean at a glacial pace trying to give Dean as much time as possible to adjust or say stop if he felt the need. Dean squeezed his eyes shut and his breathing became shallow. Cas laid a grounding hand on Deans stomach.  
“It’s okay honey…just breath with me…feel your pulse…ground yourself.” Cas watched as Dean took a few shallow breaths and turned his head to face one of the walls, his eyes looked slightly red and damp like he was trying not to cry. “you’re doing so well my prince.” Cas said with a soft soothing voice as he gently entwined his fingers with Dean. After a few moments of glacial progress Cas finally bottomed out inside his now shaking lover. Dean was now biting his lips in an attempt to keep the tears in. “hey…hey Dean…look at me honey.” Dean looked up at Cas, eye swollen with tears that he wouldn’t let go of. “you okay…you’re here with me…if you want to stop we’ll stop…and if you need to cry that’s okay…do whatever you need to do…just know that I’ll be here holding your hand every step of the way” Cas looked deeply, and directly into deans wet red eye “your safe with me Dean. And I will sit here with you as long as I have to…well get through this…” at this heavy fear and sorrow laden tears began to stream down Deans reddened face “oh sweetie…come here.” Cas stretched out his arms and Dean sat up, Cas managed to pull his crying lover to his chest without slipping out of him. Dean laid his wet face against Cas collar bone; he curled into Cass' chest like the startled child he must have felt like. Dean tried with everything he had to hold in the sound that wanted to accompany the sobs escaping his eyes.  
Dean  
Wanted so bad to be able to just relax and make love to the amazing man who had become his yearlong lover. But every touch of his hand every inch of his member that slid its way inside him just made him think of Alistair. It frustrated him for the two men couldn’t be more different. Alistair was greed, violence, danger and evil in human form and Cas had never done a single thing to harm him. Cas had helped him overcome more in the past year than all the years of Dean trying to go it alone combined. Cas was kind and gentle and beautiful and all Dean wanted was to be able to express how he felt. He just wanted to be able to show Cas how much he trusted him. to show him that he loved him, but it all just scared him. Every ounce of pleasure he drew from Cas scared him down to his core. For his mind constantly contrasted it to the pain he felt the first time someone found him fuckable. Every gentle caress made him think of his broken nose, every kiss made him think of Alistair licking the blood off his face. Every pleasure laced moan reminded him of the way his own pain laden screams reverberated off the stone. Every kind loving thing that Cas did just made everything Alistair did seem that much worse by comparison. All Dean wanted was Cas…and his demon for over a decade ago was barring him from that.  
“I'm so sick of crying over this…I'm so fucking sick of being scared…  
“sweetie you had your bodily autonomy ripped from you…at a young age…I couldn’t think of a more legitimate reason for one to cry.” Cas stated logically as he gently scratched Deans scalp “Tears are just the bodies way of expressing emotions too big to be summed up in words. Never shame yourself for crying.” He began rocking gently back and forth, cradling his lover in his arms. “If your body is doing it it’s because your body needs it.”  
“My body needs you”…Dean said into Cas chest…there was a moment of total silence as Dean raised his head to make eye contact with the man whos' arms were laced around him like the wings of an angel .  
Cas  
Deans face was bright red and wet with tears. Cas gently wiped the salt water from his lovers face, never breaking eye contact with the handsome man he had grown so close to. Dean leaned in a pressed a heavy kiss to Cas lips. Dean held the deep, profound kiss for a solid minute before pulling away.  
“don’t be timid. Stop easing me into it…just…fucking…go for it…if I need to stop I’ll tell you…I think if we take this any slower I’ll lose my nerve…  
“You sure”  
“I haven’t been this sure of something in a while”  
“Alright, lay back down honey.” Dean stretched back out onto the bed, chest still heaving with sobs still seeping from his body. "Cas…."  
"yes dean."  
"would you be against giving me head."  
"no love, not at all."  
Cas pulled out, slid down deans body. he wrapped his lips around Deans member, and sucked gently until his shaft returned to its typical turgid form. As Dean breathing morphed from sobs to moans Cas flattened out his tongue and hummed softly sending vibration straight through Dean  
Cas sat back up and lined up with Deans entrance and slid gently into his still open and welcoming orifice. Cas began slowly rocking his hips, Dean let out wincing moans through his teeth with the first few thrusts and then as his body began to adjust; Dean began to writhe. His eyes closed, heavy with pleasure, his mouth hung open as salacious moans slid from between his lips. After a few moments Deans strong hands began to wander through his hair and up Cas arms. He gripped onto Cas hips, his nails subtly pressing into Cass' flesh.  
“Do you want me to go harder?”  
“Yes” Dean said though deep moans  
Cas grabbed onto Deans hips, careful not to let his nails meet flesh. He thrust into Dean with greater intensity. Dean threw his head back as new waves of pleasure rolled through his body  
Dean  
He loved the feel of Cas inside him, and of Cas fingers pressing into his skin. The way Cas hip bones would touch the back of his legs with every thrust. He loved the deep, insatiable look in Cas eyes. He loved the waves and waves of pleasure that were taking over his body. It was like Cas was filling up so much of him that there was no room for memories of Alistair. No space for demons left to reside. Cas came along with his starry eyes and banished the darkness. He swooped in like an angel and raised him from his own mental perdition.  
Cas  
Cas knew the second he grazed Deans prostate. Deans eyes flew open, his back arched, his moans roared from deep in his chest as Dean wrapped his hands around Cas neck. Cas lent down and met; chest to chest, with Dean. The angle allowing him to pick up greater speed and depth, Cas was careful not to breathe in Deans ear; not to set off memories of the night he had momentarily forgotten. Deans fingers pressed heavily into Cas shoulder blades. He felt Deans pre-ejaculate slick the space between their chests. Cas pressed a kiss to Deans cheek as he continued with his deep and lustful thrusts. The feel of Deans moans reverberating through his chest went straight to Cass' member as it twitched with arousal.  
Dean  
This is how it was supposed to be. Just him and his love pressed chest to chest. Connected and intertwined as much as they could possibly be. The feel of Cas buried deep inside him, of his lips on his skin, their fingers laced. This is how it should always be. Dean had never been much of a crier and even less so when it came to tears of joy, but in this perfect blissful instant he couldn’t contain the tears gently trailing down his face. He couldn’t tell if they were from happiness, fear, relief, pain, love. All he knew is he couldn’t hold them in. as the tears trickled down his cheeks he could feel pleasure building deep in his abdomen, he could sense his partner nearing the edge of his own build. Cas continued with his moan inducing thrusts, grazing his prostate with every deep sensuous roll of his hips. With one last twitch the ever mounting pleasure that had been building in Dean launched itself through his core and out of his body. Cas gripped his trembling hands tightly and pressed gentle kisses all along the length of his neck as Dean shot his seed all over Cas stomach. Wave after wave of pleasure racked his body as he tried to keep control of the bliss laced moans that were climbing up his throat. Not but a moment into his own Elysian orgasm he felt his lover tumble over the brink of his own climax, his hips twitching with deep yet erratic force as he rode out every cascade of his orgasm. After the orgasm had trailed off and the afterglow set in Cas raised himself up on his elbows to lay a kiss on Deans lips. Cas took a finger and gently wiped the soft tears from off of Deans face. Cas smiled warmly down at Dean  
“Cas  
“Yes  
“I love you”  
“I love you”


End file.
